Sunday, December 14, 2008

The Hogan Family: America's Nightmare

I was never a big wrestling fan as a kid. Although when i was 10 years old I got the opportunity to watch a live WWF event at The Pond in Anaheim. One word came to mind: Ridiculous. The highlight of the show was being able to see all 600 pounds of Yokozuna's amazingly sculpted body from the nosebleed section. The downfall of course was NOT seeing Hulk Hogan.

Hulk Hogan is to wrestling what Michael Jordan is to basketball. A threat on and off the court. But the only threat the Hulkster has these days is being IN court.

As you have all heard by now the Hogan Family HAD their own reality show on VH1 wisely titled "Hogan Knows Best." Of course it shattered their family and ended in divorce. Classic reality TV. Let me break down the Hogan family for you:

Linda - a friend more than a mother. A bad wife. A very bad dresser. A very unintelligent excuse of a human being.
Nick - an aspiring racer, with a focus on drifting. A douchebag. A fantastic crash test dummy, specializing in wrecking high-end sport cars.
Brooke - a terrible singer. An empty mind. A train wreck. A very bad actor.
Hulk - a middle-aged bald man who is slowly losing his family as well as his money. An ineffective father. A shame.

Earlier this year, Nick decided to street race his yellow Supra and.....well......just look at the picture.

Nick got released from jail a couple of months ago, and though his life will go on - the only passenger John Graziano can thank Nick for making him a vegetable. I personally feel Nick's punishment was way too light, but then I started thinking....he is a Hogan - so I think that's punishment in itself.

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